Saturday, November 28, 2009

..all tied up..

I've taken up a new hobby: learning how to draw Celtic knots.

Of all the things on my to-do list (sewing skirts, homemade moon pads, self-GYN exam, belly dance, archery, sword fighting, etc..), I pounced instead on something for which I had no conscious intention. Something random, you might say (though I did have a short-lived spark of interest in it several years ago). After glimpsing George Bain's instructional manual on Celtic art at the library, I decided to give it a go.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

the hidden truth

In darkness, one can completely disappear. On the other hand, darkness allows complete self-exposure. Out of the (spot)light, we are free to be all that we are - everything, and nothing.

Hiding has been a dominant theme in my life, and perhaps that's been the subconscious reason behind my attraction to darkness, night, fog, long sleeves and jeans. But one weekend in late September proved to be a turning point.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

"Butterflies are back!"

Fragile beauty..
Always a message on the wind..

Indeed, these delicate creatures of Air keep circling back into my consciousness and my life. But I suppose that makes sense for one whose middle name is a butterfly genus!

Monday, July 6, 2009

in the forest, in the belly, in the blade...

The moment I stepped onto that patch of earth, I could feel the energy. Something powerful, with a pull, like gravity. It commanded my attention and stopped me in my tracks. I stared at the ground, caught in a strange state of wonder and confusion. There was definitely something here, I thought, and yet.. maybe it was just in my head. I wasn't sure about what I was feeling, didn't trust it, couldn't decide if it was "real" or "imagined"..

Until I looked up.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

mystic visions

Anyone who looked directly at “Chang-O” was made blind,
but “Chang-O” was everywhere, when you least expected,
creeping out from behind corners, creeping up under you,
before you had a chance to turn away.
I did everything I could to keep my eyes from seeing “Chang-O,”
except that left me confined, immobilized.
I hid beneath hoods and within walls,
and did not dare to leave my hiding place.
One day a strange brown woman
appeared at my house with a disc, seemingly of music.
She said it would help me with my problem
—if I listened, believed, followed.
I was skeptical, but I also had no other options if I wanted to live…

Sunday, June 21, 2009

signed X

what is my story my experience
the thing that fuels my action
my potential activism in the world?
by circumstance
i am a woman a woman “of color”
a city-dweller
a person of haitian descent
but do i identify with any of these things?
i am scarred
i have a petite frame and voluptuous thumbs
my boundaries are constantly under assault
my voice seems trapped
i am a writer a word-lover
a dancer a listener a space-holder
a squirrel- and bird-watcher
a desirer i yearn
for color and movement and touch
companionship and solitude
beauty simplicity ambiguity
i am afraid
constantly hiding
i do not know my own power
these are my personal identifications
the things i know in my bones
the things i feel
the things that adorn my daily life
but what do i do with it all?
the compulsion to make of myself
some coherent character and to fit
into some existing framework
is a societal ball-and-chain
that i cannot shake loose
who am i
what is my role my purpose
we *all* want to know
names definitions and succinct descriptions
are required here
that’s how you get to be somebody

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

..across the water..

“Maybe you’re a medium,” the High Priestess said.

I’d taken in the Summer Queen and apparently it showed—something in the eyes? a shift in my demeanor, in the way I moved? I’d even transmitted a message to someone in the circle.

A medium, huh? There’s something I never considered. And in the moment, the Summer Queen offered no answer. She simply let that “maybe”—pregnant with possibility—hang in the air for a moment and fall like a fine perfumed mist.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Lighthouse pointing to the Sun

As Sol approaches the peak of his power, I’m finding the path to my own. Sagittarian flame, long dormant, begs for release. The Fire Goddesses fill my ears with crackling whispers. My solar plexus chakra, dim and spinning ever so slowly, yearns for passion hot and all-consuming—explosive even.

The witch wants to burn.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

"wanna get dirrty"

I’m thinking about Dirt.

City dirt. Industrial grime. Subway filth.
Pretty Repulsive Shit
But Pachamama’s soil and dust, ah!

Bare hands and feet to raw earth
return me to the land, stir up
ancient genetic memory,
my mind lulled to sweet surrendering
sleep, revelation.

We must shun all dirt, though, we are taught.

Kill 99.99% of germs

Cleanliness is next to Godliness, after all.

Your body is not the way
Earth will lead you astray

Purify Whiten Transcend
your sorry dirty sinful state.
You are here and yet, not meant to be.

Woman, put away your dirrty money,
but do don your decorations, oh yes.
God forbid you…
Come As You Are.

O but what if
the Grunge Goddess overthrew Glam?
What if
blood sex & magick
were exalted once more?
What if
This was Enough?

Monday, May 11, 2009

On the body of the Goddess

Some days ago, I started to wonder if/worry that a Goddess spirituality rooted solely in the body reinforces the gendered mind-body split that’s been used to uphold the “patriarchy”—even though the whole mind vs. body conflict is a false dilemma. All experience is ultimately embedded in the context of the body, including the “out-of-body” variety. And yet, a major component of patriarchy and its associated religions is the notion and desire to transcend the body. On one side, the wrong/sinful side: the body, the material/matter, nature/biology & sexuality, feeling/sensation, the concrete, the present, the subjective, multiplicity. On the other side, the right/righteous side: the soul, the immaterial, [culture]/philosophy & “civilization”, thinking/intellect, the abstract, the future, the objective, singularity. These lists can go on and on, but most important to note is that they also commonly represent, respectively, the “feminine” and the “masculine”. Given this dominant framework, however distorted, is it really to our benefit to focus all of our attention on the body as the source of woman’s power?

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

[binary codes]

The expression “life on the edge” has a connotation of danger. It follows that life away from the edge is safer, stable, and thus more desirable. But why? What is on the other side of that edge line? Exactly that—the other, the unknown.

Monday, March 23, 2009

back, back, forth, and forth

I’m looking out and I’m looking in.
I’m reaching out and I’m reaching in.
And all this back and forth never seems to get me far.
One confusion resolved awakens yet another.
Who What Where Why am I? And how can I get there?

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

"Biological women"

I’d never contemplated this compound term until a couple of weeks ago—actually, I’m almost certain I’d never even heard it, let alone seen it in print anywhere—and it’s pestered my brain ever since.

Biological femaleness is a simple enough thing to understand. Before we learn about it formally in school, we come to know at a very early age that there are two basic types of creatures in the world: boys and girls, males and females, each one with its own special equipment. Boys have pee-pees and girls have… private places. Girls grow boobs and boys get boners. Fundamentally different, opposites, and yet they fit together perfectly—magically—to make life happen.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Can you hear me now??

When we talk about people “losing their voice,” we’re usually referring to a case of laryngitis. If a person “can’t speak” at all, either from birth or by permanent loss of the voice at some later point, we say they are “mute.” (The term “aphonia” is also used to denote the loss of the ability to speak, which may have a psychological or physiological basis.) And when it is said that some social unit, be it individual or group, “does not have a voice,” rightful participation and representation in the larger social framework are the issues at hand.